I Am The Mountain: How Did I Get Here?

Have you ever wondered why certain things happen? Why no matter how hard you try to live right, to do good by others, to love, to forgive, life still throws storms your way? Have you ever felt like everything keeps happening to you, but nothing seems to happen for you? Have you ever looked around and whispered, How did I get here? Not out of curiosity, but out of exhaustion.

How did I get here? To this place where my heart feels heavy and my hope feels thin. Where I’ve done everything I thought was right and still feel like I’m standing in the wrong place. I’ve asked that question more times than I can count. I’ve asked it in the dark, with tears soaking my pillow. I’ve asked it in prayer, hands raised but my spirit sinking. I’ve asked it in silence, when words couldn’t carry the weight of what I felt. And the truth is, I don’t always get an answer. But sometimes, in the quiet after the crying, I feel something stir, a whisper that says, You’re still here for a reason.

Maybe this place I’ve landed in is not punishment. Maybe it’s preparation. Maybe this part of the journey is not about getting out, but about growing through. Because sometimes, the path to healing doesn’t look holy. Sometimes it looks like confusion. Like standing in the middle of nowhere wondering how you lost your way. But even there in the middle of the “why,” in the ache of “how did I get here,” I realize God is still present. Still patient. Still guiding, even when I can’t see the way. And maybe that’s the truth I’ve been missing. The mountain is not what blocks me from God  it is where He meets me. In the fog, in the climb, in the stillness when I finally stop running from myself.

So, I may not know exactly how I got here, but I know this, I will not stay stuck here forever. I will learn what I need to learn during this time. I will heal what needs to be healed during this time so I can become who God has called me to be according to the plan he has for my life. When I look back, at this part of my journey, I will realize I never had to move the mountain. I just had to believe that I could rise with it.